Moving on... or back as it were

I finally finished my 2nd MS in my 3 novella series. I have one more, which is actually the ‘first’ one I wrote and put under the bed cuz I didn’t like it. I’m finally feeling like I can go overhaul it but what a job it’s going to be! I keep telling myself not to be intimidated. It’ll be FUN! …And I think so, but I won’t know until I get into it this week. And I’m doing war with the procrastination monster. So wish me luck!

I’ve identified some of the problems:
There isn’t enough sexual tension and conflict, and not enough connection to keep them going- basically while the backbone is good it is BORING. When I wrote it, it was a time in my life where I was afraid of conflict and things going wrong so, while I know conflict drives story, it’s very vanilla. So I want to preserve a little bit but change a whole lot. I’m a little bit intimidated, to be honest, but excited too. My goal is to get it done in 2 months – a little ambitious for me, but I’m still going to try!

Dilemma resolved!

I was sick this last month, but I was able to resolve a long time dilemma for me. I write romance. I loved romance from the time I was nine years old. It was my guilty pleasure. I say guilty, because I was raised in a puritanical religious environment where any sexual relations outside of marriage were taboo. So I’ve read romance novels under the covers of my bed at night and stuck what I was reading off in a corner of my mind “to not think about” until such time as I could resolve it. That time never came. I just kept reading and reading and reading.

Our lives changed and we are not so entrenched in that culture but we still have strong moral feelings about it. So at first I was writing the romance without the sex. It can be done, even in this day and age. But I realized the depths of the relationships I was developing and trying to illustrate were unsatisfying. Because I’ve realized that we are human, and sex is a part of that humanity that reaches us on deep levels and impacts our lives in tremendous ways.

So came the question: do I create situations where my characters have to be married before they even know each other? I know it’s been done. But I didn’t necessarily want that limitation. And so I had to go back and really ask myself what it was about marriage that is so special and made sex okay. It took me a few days but I think I got it. It is the commitment and the permanency of the relationship, the covenant between man and woman and God, whether including a piece of paper or not, that is not taken lightly, as a trial run or a one night stand.

I realized I don’t really care whether there is a ring and a license involved, but I do care that both parties are committed to and working on their relationship. That’s what romance is about. I realized that readers want to see it, experience it vicariously as they hope for the happy ending. After that all things were resolved in my mind and I wasn’t so worried about a piece of paper anymore. It has become easier for me to write my sex scenes now. I still hope they are tactful and beautiful and that they touch a place in my reader’s heart. But at least I feel like I have permission now (grin) and God will not strike me down for it. Phew!